THE ONE YOU NEED TO MARRY.

When you hear the word, marry. Beautiful wedding popes up in your mind. A bride and a groom. Absolutely in love with each other. Promising each other happily ever after. Promising to never let go off one another. Till death do as apart. The dancing, the joy, the happiness.

The same goes for relationships. You meet someone, you fall in love. Promise each other forever. You feel immense happiness, Love, Euphoria. Yet it all starts to fade away. The things you loved about the other start to bother you. One person is still head over heels in love, but the other starts to drift away.

You argue, you fight, and eventually you both go your separate ways. You might mourn, cry the loss you suffered. But after a while you start searching for your other half again.

You see, we humans think that being in a relationship is a must have. We go seek relationships with the intent to feel popular, to feel good about ourselves. A girl isn’t pretty enough as long as she is not wanted by a man. A man isn’t manly enough as long as he doesn’t have a girl on his arm.

Now a days we seek relationships not because we crave love, because this is the society’s norms.

You see, this is why relationships don’t last very long. We go in a relationship with a needy mindset.We need something from them, It can be physical intimacy, Emotional stability or any other thing. Then two things happen either get the thing that we need or we don't.

• When we get what we needed from that person, we try to deceive ourselves saying hey, I can do better then this.and the attraction you had for that person in the first place starts to fade away.
• When you don't get what you want, you start having negative feelings about yourself. the other person might not want such negativity in their life and they start to drift away.

 And it all collapses.Then we wonder why don’t our relationships work? Why can’t I find love?

What we should know that is, you don't need the other person in order to feel good about yourself. You don't need a relationship to be happy. The only person you should marry before you marry any other. Is you. Get to know yourself. Point out your likes and dislikes. Worry about yourself.

I read this somewhere “You can’t love another, if you don’t love yourself first”. I think this statement is correct. Because you see, the other person cannot provide the same level of love that you can give yourself. Now you might argue that loving yourself and loving another person are two different types of loves. And that is correct.

But you need to be whole in your own life first. Before you try to make another person whole. Be happy with you before you care about other person’s happiness. Love yourself before you claim to love another. Work on yourself, get education, start learning new things. Be a whole person. Not just a week personality who looks for attention from others. Because it will only cause you more pain and suffering in the long run. 

Same applies to men; you can live just fine without a woman. Focus on yourself. The right person will eventually come to you. Don’t seek relationships because you feel lonely. Seek relationships because you want a relationship. Not because you need a relationship to survive.